May 16, 2004 EhBC Online Discussion

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<ModBot> Welcome to or regular Sunday night discussion. Please refrain from sending "hi" and "bye" messages until after 10 pm. Also note that the discussion is being logged. If you wish to remain anonymous, you should change your nick. Tonight's discussion topic is "Newbie Night -- Bring Your Questions". The discussion is unmoderated. Enjoy!
<`abi> so...what do you want to know then jewel
<jewel`{F}> how to hide the toybag so the kids don't find it?
<`abi> leave it at your Master's
<`abi> next question
<shareena_> hi everyone
<`abi> hello shareena_
<`abi> so...what's wrong with this picture...all the newbies are at Knano and we're here trying to remember what it was like to be a newbie
<jewel`{F}> lol abi
<`abi> maybe we can be born-again newbies
<`abi> hello catsbrat{CM}
<`abi> are you a newbie?
<catsbrat{CM}> hello abi
<`abi> pandora! the perfect newbie!
* pandora`` takes a bow and refuses to let abi get to her! *g*
<`abi> lol
<catsbrat{CM}> well been in the lifestyle for 2 yrs so ya i would consider myself a newbie
<pandora``> and btw, good evening A/all
<`abi> now that's interesting catsbrat{CM}... 2 years is quite a long time in BDSM years...why do you still consider yourself a newbie?
* jewel`{F} waves hello to the very pretty perfect pandora``
<pandora``> for the sake of discussion, i could pretend to be a newbie
<pandora``> hiya jewel`{F}, it was good to see you today
<`abi> we've been trying to fake it pandora``'s not going so well
<lorraine> newbie to this chatroom community
<`abi> any surprises lorraine?
<pandora``> k, so here goes, being new to the scene, what does it take to meet the "perfect Dom"
<`abi> meeting about 100 imperfect ones as I understand it
<lorraine> well nobody really talks much, lol
<catsbrat{CM}> because i know there is alot i need to learn
<pandora``> lol, been there, got the t-shirt
<`abi> it's a very strange place for mimes to gather lorraine ... but we like it ;)
<lorraine> :)
<`abi> like what catsbrat{CM}?
<lorraine> guess I fit in jus fine
<shareena_> everyone's definition of "perfect" is different i would think pandora``
<`abi> well, yes..but don't let us discourage you lorraine ... talking is allowed
<pandora``> i agree shareena_, i was just trying to be funny
<shareena_> oh ok
<lorraine> actually, I could consider myself a real newbie, Im looking into swtching
<`abi> and you've been exclusively submissive or dominant up until now lorraine?
<Justice> hope you brought your questions then lorraine
<lorraine> submissive
<`abi> so what has you interested in switching?
<pandora``> what has made you decide to try switching?
<catsbrat{CM}> i guess its the different protocols and there are alot of implements i haven't tried
<lorraine> my Master and I believe I reached my furthes platue in masochism,
<`abi> interesting
<lorraine> I want to teach my experiences, to allow others enjoyment
<pandora``> so as i read it, you are more into the physical aspect, are you are not interested in exploring the service, or D/s side?
<lorraine> yes
<lorraine> maybe Im just getting old, lol
<`abi> lol....I don't think age turns you into a Dominant
<lorraine> lol, nor do i
<`abi> if it did, I'd be topping a stable
<`abi> hello dana_foreveralways
<pandora``> no i don't either, but i wonder if there comes a point where you have gone as far as you can as a bottom, and need a further challenge?
<pandora``> you can top me any time abi!
<dana_foreveralways> hello abi
<pandora``> hi dana_foreveralways
<`abi> hasn't happened so far ... one horizon always seems to lead to another for me
<dana_foreveralways> hi pandora
* `abi backspaces about a dozen responses to pandora's post
<dana_foreveralways> hello Eeveryone...
<lorraine> I need to take my self control to a more challenged level
<`abi> so dana...jump right in ... do you consider yourself to be a newbie?
<dana_foreveralways> hmm... more like experienced learner...
<`abi> that's a good way to put it dana
<pandora``> me neither abi, this was just a thought that came to mind, and being one who is always curious about things, i wonder if at some point the challenge ceases as a bottom and where does one go from there
<dana_foreveralways> grins... thank you abi..
<`abi> I suppose it's possible pandora
<lorraine> thats were i fell Im at now pandora
<jewel`{F}> to parenting pandora``?
<lorraine> feel
<`abi> but I just can't see it as a 'progressive' sort of thing
<`abi> and interstingly enough...the more submission I experience, the more of challenge to my self-control it becomes
<pandora``> for me, i love service, it's where i want to be, it's not about learning, it's about being what i am, so i don't feel the need to explore other avenues, but others might
<lorraine> ones forever growing, in mind, spirit and soul I believe
<pandora``> thats a good point abi, for me the challenge is always in my self-control, being able to maintain the decorum and dignity that is expected of me, even under adverse situations
<`abi> but, I keep discovering places that I didn't know existed, so who knows...maybe someday someone will push my Dominant button
<dana_foreveralways> i do understand that pandora... atleast in knowing who you are and what your needs are
<`abi> and you're very good at it pandora`` haven't slapped me once for calling you perfect
<`abi> are you planning to go about exploring your Dominant side lorraine?
<pandora``> sorry, Sir just called, so i couldn't slap abe
<pandora``> abi
<`abi> lol..he wouldn't let you?
<lorraine> I started a few years back , by taking control of myself..... I under went a major transition in my life, now its time to allow the true me to live
<pandora``> oh he would indeed, he loves seeing me top other women!
<`abi> that does seem to be a universal Dom thing
<`abi> or possibly a universal Guy thing
<dana_foreveralways> knows its a Guy thing...
<dana_foreveralways> lol
<`abi> hello dove
<`abi> are you a newbie?
<_dove{S}> hello abi
* `abi smiles innocently
<_dove{S}> old as dirt........... oh you mean in the lifestyle? *grins*
<`abi> does that make you a dirty old lady?
<_dove{S}> works for me abi
* jewel`{F} bites her tongue
<`abi> are you allowed to do that jewel?
<`abi> self-scening ... tsk, tsk
<pandora``> lol
* catsbrat{CM} giggles
<jewel`{F}> yup, cause it keeps me from saying something that may hurt me later
<_dove{S}> well now i'm curious jewel
<jewel`{F}> about dove?
<_dove{S}> well i dunno, whatever you're biting your tongue about jewel
<_dove{S}> Are there no newbies in the group?
<`abi> no, they're all at Knano!
<_dove{S}> figures
* `abi mutters and bitches and whines
<dana_foreveralways> lol
* _dove{S} sees some new names
<pandora``> i keep trying to think of things i wanted to know as a newbie, so i can ask some newbie type questions, but i can't remember what i wanted to know then!
<`abi> you mean all I have to do to be a newbie is change my name?
<`abi> I wanted to know if I was too old
<_dove{S}> i wanted to know if i had to like pain
<`abi> apparently they don't check ID's
<catsbrat{CM}> well i have a question
<jewel`{F}> oh oh oh
<pandora``> ask away catsbrat{CM}
<jewel`{F}> i've got a newbie type question
<catsbrat{CM}> did any of you as newbies have trouble getting to different events?
<_dove{S}> It took me 6 years to get to an event catsbrat{CM}
<`abi> well, when I started, there were only about 2 a year!
<pandora``> i was scared to death of going to events! fortunately i met someone in the scene who took me in hand and introduced me
<`abi> so it wasn't as easy as it is now
<`abi> what is it that you're finding difficult catsbrat{CM}?
<catsbrat{CM}> i would love to go to the different events but i don't have my license and no way to get to different events
<`abi> it's a logistical thing
<_dove{S}> i've seen emails from others looking for rides catsbrat{CM}
<catsbrat{CM}> i have tried that _dove{S} and no luck
<_dove{S}> Are you from this area catsbrat{CM}?
<catsbrat{CM}> i am in St. Thomas
<`abi> well...hmmmm.....solution.... get your license?
<_dove{S}> i know people in London, but not St. Thomas
<catsbrat{CM}> trying about half way of saving up the $100.00
<tenacity> well, that's good catsbrat{CM}
<_dove{S}> lol
<tenacity> what are you most looking forward to about attending events catsbrat{CM}?
<lorraine> where are these events held
<tenacity> Kitchener, London, Toronto, Hamilton, Woodstock, Stratford, Guelph
<catsbrat{CM}> meeting the people i have talked to online and experiencing the aviance of of the events
<lorraine> so there is some here in london, cool thans
<lorraine> than
<tenacity> can find them on the ehbc website
<_dove{S}> yes lorraine, there are munches and DAL in London, as well as workshops
<lorraine> k, didnt think my k was working, must be the fingers, lol
<catsbrat{CM}> haven't been to London munch in almost a yr
<jewel`{F}> great group in London lorraine
<Miss_Kristaz> Im in london
<tenacity> hello Miss_Kristaz ... didn't see you sneak in
<tenacity> are you a newbie?
<jewel`{F}> have you been out to any munches Miss_Kristaz?
<lorraine> I take its best to talk to Dark Angel about the london community
<tenacity> depends on what you want to know lorraine
<_dove{S}> i believe jewel is active in the London community?
<Miss_Kristaz> yes i have
<tenacity> but DA is certainly knowledgeable, yes
* tenacity tries to erase that from the log so he doesn't get a swellder head
<jewel`{F}> yes dove i get to the munches regularly
<_dove{S}> too late
<lorraine> atending munches, workshops, and events
<dana_foreveralways> fantastic group in London...
<_dove{S}> lorraine perhaps you could ask jewel
<lorraine> :)
<jewel`{F}> recently if i may ask Miss_Kristaz?
<Miss_Kristaz> yes i was at the last one
<jewel`{F}> i admit, trying to put a face to the nick
<tenacity> hello Prathen ... home already?
<jewel`{F}> hi Prathen
<Prathen> Hi tenacity, jewel. Yeah, I decided to head back early, was not really anything to do there for me.
<jewel`{F}> no one to talk to Prathen?
<jewel`{F}> hi b24h
<tenacity> hell b24h
<b24h> greetingd
<tenacity> are you a newbie?
<b24h> kind of bit of lurker
* Prathen shakes his head. "Not really jewel
<tenacity> hmmmm....
<b24h> used to look in 3 yrs ago
<tenacity> so, you're a relurker then
<b24h> Yup
<tenacity> Prathen is pretty new...what are your observations as a newbie Prathen?
<Prathen> If at all possible, do not go to events alone
<Prathen> The people I have met have all been very nice
<tenacity> I'd say that's actually pretty good advice, at least as far as play parties are concerned
<Prathen> But most keep to their own circle
<tenacity> they can be a little overwhelming at first
<Miss_Kristaz> hello
<catsbrat{CM}> play parties can be very overwelming
<Prathen> I think I am going to keep away from the large play parties. I have been to two, and I left both early
<lorraine> at the moment alone is all I have to go on
<b24h> why did you leave?
<Prathen> I have the same problem lorraine.
<tenacity> I know that alot of people feel more comfortable once they've gone to a few munches and know some people
<Prathen> I left because there was not really much there for me to do b24h. I do not really know anyone
<lorraine> at least we got something in common now, lol
<tenacity> even then it helps to have someone who can tell you about what you're seeing
<Prathen> That is true tenacity
<Prathen> And you can only stand and watch for so long
<catsbrat{CM}> and envy
<dana_foreveralways> has the same problem... not knowing a soul but ive made the first step and actually walked through the door at the last munch..
<b24h> ahh,might help if there was someone to guide newcomers
<Prathen> I went to the last munch, and the brunch that was today
<Prathen> As well as the workshop and playparty in Hamilton last month, and the playpartie today
<jewel`{F}> getting out to that first munch seems to be the hardest step
<lorraine> Im looking to attend the next london munch, at least its a starting point, besides chatting here
<Prathen> Hi brit
<catsbrat{CM}> tell me about it jewel`{F} first munch i was soooooooooooo nervous
<kw_brit> lo all
<dana_foreveralways> it was jewel... actually it was my second munch in over a year.. lol
<lorraine> people just have the tendence to stay away from me
<jewel`{F}> lorraine you will find that over all London group is very warm and welcoming
<Prathen> I think I am just going to go to the local munch and brunch until I am more known, and see if I get invited to small gatherings
<lorraine> hasnt found london to welcoming so far
<Prathen> I think I would to a lot better in a smaller crowd
<dana_foreveralways> so agrees with that jewel..
<catsbrat{CM}> i found london very welcoming
<lorraine> and I lived here all my life
<ModBot> There are only about five minutes left in the formal part of tonight's discussion. Does anyone have any last-minute thoughts on the subject?
<jewel`{F}> i have most of my life as well lorraine
<dana_foreveralways> thinks nametags would help though.. lol
<dana_foreveralways> i was so nervous i couldnt remember mine
<jewel`{F}> being new can be a very daunting thing
<lorraine> its my other lifestyle which eople are afraid to approach me from
<Prathen> hopefully soon I will get put on the email list
<catsbrat{CM}> is there anything we can do to help newbies?
<ModBot> Well, that's it for the formal part of the discussion. The discussion log is now closed. It should be processed and uploaded to the website soon. Please feel free to continue chatting informallly. Have a good night, everyone!
<ModBot> Thank you to everyone who participated in the discussion.