nots for a badge at 14
<krista-F> what first experience are we talking about....my first oreo.....?? bra??
<LadyNichola> Was it the first time you fantasized sexually (and did something about it even if you were on your own?)
<`abi> in a perfect world, every experience is a first
<krista-F> i have told many this story
<krista-F> but.......here we go
<krista-F> at my house......barbie and ken did NOT go to the soda shoppe
<victoria_angel> snicker - this sounds interesting
<krista-F> ken took barbie out in the woods....tied her up......whooped her ass.and then fucked her hard....and i had no idea what sex was then....ken just got on top....bounced up and down on here....and that was sex to me at that time
<krista-F> i could not have been more than ten
<krista-F> and i have no idea why i was like that......never have figured it out
<victoria_angel> did you see soemthing as a child krista-F
<krista-F> but that is the truth of my early inklings
<krista-F> no!!!......i lived the most white bread existance you could imagine.....think ward and june
<LadyNichola> I lost my virginity to a "stronger woman" at age 15. she threw me on the bed and ripped my clothes off. The sex was terrible, but the experience was very exciting.
<QTIP> sex=secret/adult stuff, krista-f?
<krista-F> again..never the norm for me.....i had a broken arm..broken collar bone.stitches.etc etc etc.at 16 when i had sex for the first time
<krista-F> i lived in a home where there was no sex Q-tip.....im adopted......lol
<LadyNichola> My next experience at about 16 was with an older woman (a teacher) who liked to be spanked.
<krista-F> them women surrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre liked you Ma'am......:))
<`abi> You went a whole year without sex LadyNichola?
<QTIP> let's see...i'm walking behind a deli with my mom. i'm in 2nd grade. there's this word spray painted on the loading dock door. it's like "duck" but starts with an "f". i ask mom what that word is. mom tells me, "it's nothing. but don't let me EVER hear you saying it!" powerful word
<LadyNichola> Never really gave much thought to D/s until much later in life - I just did what I did.
<QTIP> sex wasn't discussed
<LadyNichola> I was just better at being a Domme than any of My partners... so that's the job I ended up with
<`abi> was D/s what you did LadyNichola, without calling it that?
<victoria_angel> sex was discussed in my house, but i was exposed to what i thought was sex - in 007 movies ata a young age
<QTIP> in 5th grade i'm being taught by a nun who hates me. i have my first orgasm while fantisizing shaving a woman's head bald while she cries. you'd have to know the ritual a female goes through as a novice nun to realize the significance
<krista-F> i get it Q-tip
<krista-F> i did not have my first D/s experience until my 20's
<krista-F> but damn it was all that i had dreamed of
<krista-F> rope.gags.blindfolds....a belt .....great sex
<LadyNichola> abi, I've always been pretty assertive... and sexually adventurous... but not _always_ Dominant in the bedroom
<krista-F> i was in heaven.....but had no idea it was a lifestyle...i never called him Sir or anything like that
<krista-F> it was just what we did together ..sexually......and we were only about sex
<QTIP> at 24 i knew what i desired but was afraid to ask. my 19 yr old gf moves in with me. she has complimentary desires to my own. we didn't discuss these things. i just pinched and twisted her nipples and she got off. we experimented and both were off to the races
<krista-F> funny how like finds like......isn't it?
<LadyNichola> we're here arent we?
<QTIP> actually, sorta romantic
<LadyNichola> I really didnt discover the "scene" until a little over 10 years ago.
<`abi> and did that make it all feel 'new' again?
<LadyNichola> oh, absolutely
<krista-F> for me it was about 5.when i got my computer....it was my path to all of this for me
<`abi> how so LadyNichola?
<QTIP> back before the internet and after i broke up with the first, i really had to search for partners.
<LadyNichola> In some respects, it's still "new" - There's always something to learn
<krista-F> for me as well....
<LadyNichola> But, I remember the first time I saw a crop
<krista-F> but i love learning in general.......so i am quite content
<LadyNichola> It seemed so brutal - I couldn't understand how it could be pleasurable
<LadyNichola> The first time I picked one up in a scene, I was nervous.
<`abi> I'm guessing the person on the receiving end was pretty nervous too
<LadyNichola> I didn't tell her it was My first time
<QTIP> i blushed when i bought my first crop ;-). it was at a tack shop. i was still living with the 19 yr old
<QTIP> ah...the good old days ;-)
<LadyNichola> I hear you QTIP
<LadyNichola> Anyway, back at this virgin ass... I was wondering where to begin
<LadyNichola> pacing aroung
<LadyNichola> and without thinking, I twirled it round My fingertips
<LadyNichola> It was one of those weird "out of body experiences" that made me laugh out loud
<LadyNichola> I thought to myself... "I may not have used one of these before, but some part of me obviously feels comfortable"
<LadyNichola> so I went with that
<krista-F> and a star was born!!!!!!!!
<LadyNichola> Oh gods, talk about nervous... the first time I used a single tail in public I felt like a total spaz
<QTIP> so much of my first play experiences were sexual foreplay. public play scenes frustrate me now. i want to see the sexual desire i want to inspire in my partner. i want to get off afterward...and for my partner to get off
<LadyNichola> public play has a different flavor QTIP
<krista-F> im about to get off now....i think.......lol
<LadyNichola> I guess I came at it from a different angle - I do enjoy D/s sex
<QTIP> also, i want the full focus of when i'm alone with a partner...with no distractions
<LadyNichola> but play was (and is) about sensuality for Me... and in particular the sense of power
<LadyNichola> obviously you get that in different ways in private.
<LadyNichola> But I love public beating/whipping etc. because it adds a whole layer of power to the experience
<`abi> It adds other layers too I think ... it's a different sort of energy
<LadyNichola> calls for a different kind of focus
<krista-F> i enjoy both.......but find the one on one....alone.. has its benefits
<LadyNichola> But, (to support what QTIP says) a Dominant can relax a bit more in private
<`abi> I can remember going to my first public event and thinking there wasn't a chance in hell that I'd ever play publicly
<`abi> I've spent alot of time in hell since then
<victoria_angel> lol - abi-hell?
<victoria_angel> lovin' every minute of it - eh?
<krista-F> me too abi....first of all......i would have to take of some clothes.....yeow!!!!!!!
<QTIP> at the first public play party i attended, i pretty much "held up a wall". i stayed quiet and watched. there was this sub who came out of a scene by having a leather hood/mask removed. she stared at me. later in the cloak room as we gathered our coats, she came up to me, straitened my tie and said, "next time arrive earlier."
<krista-F> well.....you go Sir!!!!!
<ModBot> There are only about five minutes left in the formal part of tonight's discussion. Does anyone have any last-minute thoughts on the subject?
<QTIP> this play party was pre-internet. i saw some of the folks i met at that play party at a music concert afterward. i went up to say hello. they acted as if i didn't exist. that's what it was like in those days
<QTIP> it's nice to have IRC to allow discussion and open things up a bit
<victoria_angel> smile - it is like seeing someone at church who you saw at a fet before that
<krista-F> i had a girl i used to babysit show up at the private club i belong to
<krista-F> very strange experience
<QTIP> a new group for under 35 started here. they call themselves TNG (The Next Generation) ;-)
<ModBot> Well, that's it for the formal part of the discussion. The discussion log is now closed. It should be processed and uploaded to the www.ehbc.ca website soon. Please feel free to continue chatting informallly. Have a good night, everyone!
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