February 15, 2004 EhBC Online Discussion

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<ModBot> Welcome to or regular Sunday night discussion. Please refrain from sending "hi" and "bye" messages until after 10 pm. Also note that the discussion is being logged. If you wish to remain anonymous, you should change your nick. Tonight's discussion topic is "Newbie Night -- Bring Your Questions!". The discussion is unmoderated. Enjoy!
<celtic_mist> ohh, it is sunday isnt it lol
* celtic_mist is not a newbie, so has not a question to toss out lol
<kw_brit> Question then.....
<kw_brit> How does one encourage their partner to get further into the scene if they are not keen?
<celtic_mist> hmmm, well, bring up the topic, and discuss it, find out why the partner is not so keen
<Anticipation^> the question implies kw_brit, that the partner has agreed to a certain dimension thus far? with or without enjoyment?
<kierana{DRFL}> do they know the interest you have...or not
<kw_brit> Well the clothes are the turn on for her really & some minor role play but nothing more. We do discuss it somethimes, it doesn't freak her out or anything, but she has yet to be convinced to pursue it more
<Anticipation^> what has her reactions been to your discussions....have the two of you surfed the different websites and read up on the topic together kw_brit?
<celtic_mist> and what sort of things are you interested in having her do?
<kw_brit> We've just agreed to disagree I'm afraid, Anticpation. And I would very much like to explore the boundaries of pleasure & pain moreso than than she is comfortable with.
<celtic_mist> hiya Justice
* celtic_mist figures since not much discussion going on, is ok to greet
<Justice> lol - hi mist
<ShardAngeli> i'm back everyone, sorry for the idle
<Anticipation^> so long as she isnt indicating that it is something that will never come to pass....which you stated "she isnt freaked out or anything".....then my suggestion is to simply keep that line of communication open....bring the subject up casually, without any strings attached....occasionally....just enough that she is aware that it still is of an interest to you....and just let things take its natural course
<kw_brit> thanks for that
* celtic_mist also agrees with Anticipation^
<Anticipation^> personally...I wouldnt give up...*smile*...but its not something you can force the issue with......a gentle casual discussion occasionally....on how it interests you....how it MIGHT have some benefits for you both....etc....will go a lot farther than saying..."Please learn this....or else"....not that I am saying that is what you are doing kw_brit
<celtic_mist> have to run, bbl
<kw_brit> Well as I say the fet wear is a big time turn on for her, but not much more. Maybe if we get out to any good parties this year she would be open to discussion
<kw_brit> I just wondered if people tend to date 'in the scene' rather than trying to bring that into a standard relationship
<Anticipation^> I might suggest munches before the parties......introduce her to others involved...in a social setting...before an active playing setting
<Anticipation^> my fiance and I knew we were both interested in this.......but made it a point to leave D/s OUT of our relationship...until we were sure it could survive days where it took a back burner in our lives
<shareena> there must be no newbies
<shareena> hi PanheadAL
<PanheadAL> greetings shareena
<shareena> hello kw_brit. I haven't seen you on here before
<kw_brit> Oh, I pop in now and again
<shareena> kewl. Do you attend the events around the area?
<kw_brit> Have done a couple of munches (seems like forever ago though) What about you?
<ModBot> There are only about five minutes left in the formal part of tonight's discussion. Does anyone have any last-minute thoughts on the subject?
<shareena> i've been to a few munches
<shareena> and some play parties
<ModBot> Well, that's it for the formal part of the discussion. The discussion log is now closed. It should be processed and uploaded to the www.ehbc.ca website soon. Please feel free to continue chatting informallly. Have a good night, everyone!
<ModBot> Thank you to everyone who participated in the discussion.